I Am Badly Losing the Facial Forum January Contest

Yesterday, the voting for January's cum-covered wife and girlfriend competition on Facial Forum started, and I am losing horribly. I am somewhat surprised that it is having this much of an effect on me, but I am just gutted.

Master entered some of our blog photos for the competition, mainly to try to raise awareness for Husband and Slut. As Master reminded me last night, most of the photos he submitted to the competition don't, actually, show any facials which might have something to do with it (as that is kind of the point of Facial Forum). But I don't care. It is a really shitty feeling to be beaten so badly when being judged on your sexiness. I didn't think I would win, but I also didn't think I would lose so drastically, though. I'm embarrassed to have let my Master down, and I'm feeling really bad about myself right now. Ugh.

For the past week or so I've been riding high on the kind support, encouragement, and feedback Master and I have received about our new blog- thank you! As surprising as it may seem, we're both very private about our sex lives. If I do talk to girlfriends about our intimate life it's only in very vanilla terms, and I think Master probably never talks about it with his friends. Because we don't normally put anything out there, it's been a blast for us to share some of our naughty secrets with you.

But this competition thing has really thrown me for a loop and I just can't seem to shake it. Although he's been a member of Facial Forum for a while and I've fantasized about putting pictures on the site for the past several months, I hadn't had the courage for Master to post them until we started this blog. But now that he's done it, I sort of regret it. It's not really fun & exciting like I had hoped, but it's really been more hurtful than anything else. I guess the only positive thing I can say about it is at least the other girls don't have to feel bad about losing! They are very sexy!

I talked with Master about how losing makes me feel last night and was weirdly pretty emotional about it. This is pretty new territory for me, and the internet can be a harsh place. I am lucky that he is so sweet to me, and I could hear he was trying to be supportive and understanding. But I also know he was pretty frustrated by my hurt pride and felt fairly helpless to make me feel better. It's just humiliating, and I feel like I've disappointed him. I recently mentioned that I am a people-pleaser, and it is really difficult for me to come to terms with failing at anything. So failing at being sexy especially sucks. I am trying to get over it, though, and will try to stay away from the site until the voting ends on the 8th, because it only drops me down when I check the voting progress (it just keeps getting worse...)

Anyway, special thanks to our sweet blog reader rybo for voting for me in the competition; it means a lot! And thanks for letting me get this off my chest; I'm grateful I have this space to vent. I mean, it's not exactly like I can call up a friend to complain about this one! But I suppose this is part of the reality of my Master's and my life together, and I feel like it would be disingenuous for me to pop out a light and flirty post when I'm feeling anything but. Blah, blah, blah.

xoxo, Slut

Update (8 hours later): Master is home, and all is well! Just seeing him makes me feel lifted and content. My Master says he thinks that I am the sexiest one, and his is the only opinion that really matters to me anyway. Feeling much, much better. Until tomorrow! xoxo, Slut